Counselors Make Life Miserable

Original post date: 5/8/2008

I do not see the need for a website so that the ‘public’ knows where a sex offender lives. Why? Do we know where murderers and burglars live? No, we don’t. My best friend has been paroled to me and it’s been no picnic. He has been verbally abused by his one agent who constantly called him ‘Jerry’ for ‘Jerry’s kids’. They are set up to fail once released as (the state) wants them all locked up. My friend can’t even talk to his children because they are minors. It’s ridiculous. I would imagine family support would be helpful, not harmful. And what the state calls counseling? They should be ashamed of themselves. They’re not here to help anyone. Their goal is to make life absolutely miserable in the hopes that you will re-offend.
Anonymous in Illinois

Children, victims of father’s perceived crimes

Original post date: 16.05.2008

Editor’s note: The names and the state have been omitted to keep the anonymity of the persons involved.

From the wife of a sex offender ‘out west.’

I have chosen to sign because I have watch the change in laws slowly destroy my husband. I don’t clam his innocent or his guilt as that was decided years ago when he took the plea agreement. I have found that claming his innocence, which I believe in, only makes my statement seem biased and defensive. His innocence or guilt doesn92t really matter anyways. The person he is matters! His criminal history only has two marks – The 13 year old conviction that made him a Sex Offender (lewdness w/ a minor under 14, His accuser was 13) and a 9 year old conviction for failure to register. The failure to register was simply a forgotten thing and he spent a 3 day weekend in jail to which the judge after hearing his side took his guilty plea and gave him time served. Thank God for small favors and a touch of understanding.

But back to the man he is. ‘Gordon’ is one of the strong people I know; his soul, his heart, and his mind have survived so much and he has not lost his love of life, the ability to laugh at himself, or his ability to love and honor his friends and family. He has a grandeur of manner, and magnanimity of personality. He is spontaneously creative, outgoing, warm hearted and plain spoken; as well as ambitious, courageous, strong willed, independent, and self-confident. In his relations with others he is open, sincere, genuine and trusting. He is a wonderful father to our living children. He is also a father who is grieving; grieving for his beloved children who were born into heaven, grieving for the plans that will never take place. He morns the lives that will never be lived and the sons that he will never know. Sometimes he can be one of the most unpleasant human beings imaginable, displaying autocratic pride, and an excessive temper; becoming self-centered, boastful, pompous, and overbearing. But that is part of his Leoness. Besides I can be ten times worse than him, as I am sure everyone else can too.

He was a tier 2 in our state by 6 points. These ‘points’ I believe are unfair because on the form you get 6 points for both refusing counseling or not needing it. He never refused it, just didn’t need it. Next year we would have been allowed to ask for a review of his rating and hearing to possibly reduce it. A new law has passed and as of July 1st 2008 he will be considered a tier 3 and we have no way to ask for that review hearing. He is also now under a life time commitment to register publicy. It has been hard enough for him to find work, now we feel it will be impossible.

Who he is doesn’t matter. Almost 15 years and no reoffence or anything but a simple mistake with registration. He works, pays taxes, and for the first time in years (10 years) got to vote in 2004. He loves his children but avoids the close relationship with our daughter he has with our son. For the first 3 months of her life ha was scared to even hold her, when someone started to use CPS to harass him it got worse. He has never given her a bath and doesn’t like to help her get dressed. He doesn’t like going to the park even as we live in a small town and he fear what someone might think or say about him with his children.

So I fully agree with the statement and wish my husband could sign it as well. I hope the laws change because I feel the unfairness that is pushed on my family shouldn’t be suffered by anyone, let alone the children like mine who are becoming victims of the perceived crimes of their father.

Innocent Man Exonerated!

Original post date: 16.05.2008
A Tale of Eventual Justice, sent in by an RSOL participant from Oregon!

Without money, forget justice! Never take a plea bargain if you are innocent! They are NEVER bargains!

Wrongfully accused and indicted and ultimately had charges dropped.

A vindictive ex partner in business planted cd’s that contained CP on them in a loaner car I used for two days. I was indicted by a politically motivated prosecutor (who is now a judge) and my life ruined as a result. Being accused makes you guilty and being exonerated means you had a good attorney who “got you off”

I went from making 16,500 a month to 5,000 a month, I lost the life that I had spent a lifetime working towards. The financial stress it created caused me to lose my wife who had stood by me for the 3 1/2 years it took to finally get this case to trial. The charges were dropped by the new prosecutor who took the case after the first one had been elected judge. She said they had no evidence and no witnesses making getting a conviction extremely problematic. Before they dropped the charges but after they knew that I wasn’t guilty they tried to get me to plead to something …anything …no jail time no fine as long as whatever I plead to forced me to become a registered sex offender- society’s biggest pariah! (Thank goodness this person refused!)

This will be the hardest fight we will ever face. It is almost impossible to get a politician to appear to be soft on crime and especially soft on sex crimes …and especially ones involving minors.

Summer Camp Fling a Nightmare For Teen

Original post date: 15.04.2008
Try to imagine, you’re 17, a junior in high school on summer vacation. You’re unusually tall and still a bit awkward with girls. At a local resort you meet a girl vacationing with her parents, she is beautiful and she actually likes you. After a few days she invites you to her cabin while her parents are away. With heart pounding nervousness, you’re both kissing and touching each other. A phone rings, you’re interrupted and this ends the encounter.

Seems so innocent, maybe a preview to an after school special.

Now imagine, two days later you are arrested for a violent rape. You tell the police everything you know about the beautiful girl you’d met, you tell them about the kissing, the touching and you swear to God that you never had intercourse. You’re given a Public Defender who tells you the rape tests support the girls claim and that he has worked his magic and convinced the DA to entertain a plea of “lewd and lascivious acts” , it’s “less than rape” and he also worked a miracle to keep it in Juvenile Court. Yes, this Public Defender saved your life and you should be forever in his debt, right?

The plea is accepted and he is formally charged with PC 280 (a), Lewd and lascivious acts with a child under 14″. Yes, in court we all learned this beautiful girl, fully developed and far more mature he, is only 13. The touching and kissing is a felony, child molestation, a registerable offence, a life long sentence.

Mandatory minimums sends this young boy to the California Youth Authority for a three year term. He is to attend a sex offender treatment program and he is to be housed with all the other sex offenders. During his first two weeks he is beaten severely, given the nick name “Chester” by the cruel and extremely corrupt guards. He is bunked next to a 19 year old who has been in the system for most of his life. His latest crime was the rape and vicious beating of a three year old.

This boy entered the CYA a normal red blooded teenager, a varsity basketball and football player, some minor scrapes with local police, but nothing serious. He is now an angry 25 year old man, full of hate and resentment. He is a registered child molester and is required to report in every time he moves and 10 days before his birthday each year. His birthday is early January, which makes the holidays particularly bad. If pulled over by any law enforcement he is required to show his RSO card, this leads to ridicule by the officer and the complete devastation of any friend he may have with him.

This is a true story and if you don’t think it could happen to you or your son, you need to open your eyes and look at the thousands of young boys in California who are living the same nightmare. I am of the belief that nothing will be done to change the over zealous sex offender laws in California until this happens to a Senators son, maybe Arnolds son. There is not one politician who will to step up and point out that the current SO Laws are destroying the lives of thousands of young boys. Behind closed doors they all sympathies with my son’s story and wish me luck in my endeavor to change the law, but not one of them will help write a bill to just tweak the current legislation, to add in some common sense. It’s political suicide to show compassion for a RSO, or to be seen as soft on crime.


I thought you’d be interested in the circumstances that lead to the accusation of rape.

The girl was terrified of the punishment in store for her so she said “I didn’t invite him, he just came over and started kissing me”. That snowballed into a violent rape story. She was rushed to the hospital, given a rape exam and released.

We had asked to look at the results of the rape test, but the miraculas Public Defender told us that because it was a Juvenile case we were not “privy” to those records.

After nearly a year in CYA he was examined by a Dr. Data to determine what type of SO treatment program was needed to meet the court requirement. Dr. Data believed our son and he requested the entire court folder, including rape test results. As it turned out, the girl was a virgin, she had not been raped and in fact while being interviewed by a nurse she admitted the contact had been consensual. Dr. Data wrote a letter to the Youthful Defender Parole Board and requested that our son be released based on the lies the DA and the Public Defender had been guilty of. This was denied because it was a plea and because he had admitted to kissing and touching her…..A FELONY.

Dr. Data did succeed in removing him from any sex offender treatment program and allowing him to be moved to a non sex offender unit. This did not stop the abuse and the nick name “Chester”. The registration requirement would stay as well.

During our son’s three years in CYA the girl gave birth to a child (maybe two) fathered by a boy the same age as our son. He was never charged.

20 year old faces vicious cycle – no housing, no school

Original post date: 02.08.2008

My 20-year-old son sat in jail for six months with 39 charges pending initially, then dropped almost immediately to 16 and stayed posted online, with his picture, for the entire six months, enough time for the entire community to see it and for some ignorant people to speculate about what a “horrible sex offender” he must be.

Of course, his circumstances were ridiculous, and passing polygraphs — more than one — and providing all sorts of irrefutible evidence supporting his innocence was of little or no help aside from the fact that his 39/16 charges ended up as 2 C felonies (because these were two friends who thought this was “fun,” and that they “make a good team.” ) They offered absolutely no evidence except for the allegation. They could not get times, dates, circumstances or anything right — the police reports and discovery were a mess on their side, so much so that when I read all 300+ pages of discovery, I was excited, because anyone with half a brain could see right through what this was.

But, the attorney, probably rightly so, advised my son to take the offered five-year probationary plea in order to avoid our state’s HORRIBLE mandatory sentencing should something have gone awry at trial. He’s now a felon who has to register, no end in sight. He’s attempting to transfer probation to another county so he can go to school. Though he’s registered at school (they haven’t asked about criminal history but the PO will likely visit the dean), we’re struggling with finding housing. He must have housing in place and either a job or be enrolled in school BEFORE the PO here will begin the transfer process, which takes 45 days, hardly enough time before school starts the third week in September. He must get out of this small town. His PO just recently set an 8:00 p.m. curfew and told him the two friends he was hanging out with are now off limits because they associate with girls not yet 18.  Seems like they’re trying their best to trap him.

So many harsh conditions for a fine young man

Original post date: 19.07.2008

My son is now released during the week, but has to go to jail from Friday’s at 6:00 p.m. to Monday’s at 6:00 a.m. He was put on high risk because of not living with a girl for two years or longer and his age. He had just turned 23.  He was also charged with two counts, because of being honest and telling every where he touched her and every aspect of their encounter. He cannot be around any family members or anyone else’s children under the age of 18. He is having to sell his home, that he worked so hard for because it is too close to a school. He did not get any time taken off his sentence for the 100 days he spent in jail and I have never heard of that, but I was told that (our) county does not take time served off before trial date. Some of the young men are being held for six months in (this) County before they are even being charged. They have six months to charge them and these politicians are taking advantage of that! He has to do one year of weekends and he pays $574.00 in fines and fees not including any polygraph test or alcohol or drug test on him, which he must also pay for. He also has three to five meetings a week he is required to attend…..

Disfigured Youth Persecuted

Original post date: 14.07.2008

I want my son to have hope. He is still incarcerated at (our) County Prison. He is serving an 12 month less 1 day sentence for consensual sex with a minor. He was 19 at the time,she was 14.

My son suffered from hemifacial paralysis when he was 18 months old. After 14 facial surgeries to reconstruct his eye, mouth and cheek, he suffered most of his childhood from low self esteem and never thought any girl would find him attractive. The surgeries improved his appearance and restored symmetry to his face. I thought he was very handsome, but he never saw anything but the scars. He and this girl found each other attractive and they had consensual sex.

He felt so guilty, he turned himself in to police. The girl and her mother did not want to press charges, but the state did. Now he faces the public humiliation on the registry. He did take a plea bargain that sentenced him to less than one year in prison, with a year of parole afterward. We are still very green and do not have all of the information we need. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to finally express my son’s story.

Adult student fails class, blames prof. as rso

Original post date: 11.07.2008

Although the statute I was convicted under (Wisconsin, convicted in 1995) will read as though I forcibly assaulted a child, in reality, I had sex with a 15 year old who told me she was 19. That’s all I did. Now, I have to register every four months in Kansas (in person, at the police station, where I am frisked), and every year for the rest of my life in Wisconsin. I had hopes of getting through this, completing my PhD and becoming a professor. But last semester, A girl who failed the class I was teaching complained about me because she saw my name printed in the local newspaper, and stated that she was afraid to come talk to me. Can you believe that?

I appreciate what you[RSOL] are trying to do, because my life is for the most part ruined because of the unnecessary stigma that has been assigned.

Plea to save life, loses it!

Original post date: 03.07.2008
Former editor’s note: This entry sent from a registered sex offender, is an important warning: Beware of so-called plea bargains, often put forth by defense lawyers, not understanding the long impact and humiliation of the sex offender registries – which are often retroactive, affecting people who pled years ago, thinking it was over. IT’S NOT OVER in America, folks. Again, BEWARE OF PLEA BARGAINS!

Almost a decade ago, I took a plea deal in a corrupt town.

I took a plea deal to save my life, but now I find I am losing it. I recently lost both my jobs, my house and am in debt. I cannot live in my old house; still available to me but the law prevents me from living there. I am homeless in a few days with no money, no food, no job, few friends who cannot provide me a place to sleep because of the laws. Parole (agents) cannot help me. All because I took a plea deal nearly a decade ago to save my life.


Original post date: 03.07.2008

Two teen atheletes shared 10 second videos on cellphones – For that, one now faces having to leave home, go to jail, and be placed on the internet sex offender registry for at least 10 years….

My son is in the backyard right now, sitting around a campfire with some friends. The thought of him being restricted from our house sickens me….

My son has been charged with “Telephonic Dissemination of Obscene Material to a Minor”. He was an 18 year old high school senior when the charges were filed. The charges stem from a ten second cell phone video that was sent to another male high school senior who was 17 at the time (he sent the video on to others). Unfortunately, this type of behavior among high school students has become too common. My son was a well known athlete in town, and law enforcement has decided to make an example out of him in an attempt to curb such behavior. The local media coverage, propagated by local law enforcement, was incredible. The story was the lead story on all three local television stations, morning, noon, and night, for two days straight. It was devastating, and we literally put my son on a suicide watch.

Now, the county attorney has proposed a deal where my son pleads guilty to the aforementioned charge, and receives a deferred judgment. My son has never had as much as a speeding ticket, and has been a good citizen. In discussions with our attorney and the judge, the county attorney has indicated that my son is not really a sex offender and the judge has indicated that he would be inclined to go along with a deferred judgment.

Here’s where the Iowa sex offender laws come into play. Although my son would have no criminal record, he would be forced to register as a sex offender for the next ten years. The county attorney thought that my son would come off of the sex offender list once he had completed the terms of the deferred judgment. He is wrong.

This is a boy who has grown up in a day care (which my wife runs), who umpires youth baseball and softball, and who is very well liked in our very small hometown. He will be forced to move out of our house, and will not be allowed to visit. His college plans will be in serious jeopardy, and he will be branded and lumped in with truly dangerous criminals. Basically, his life will be destroyed, although no one in law enforcement believes that he is a threat at all.

I do not believe that the intent of this law was to punish high school kids that exchange inappropriate cell phone material, but rather to protect young children from adult criminals. However, the Iowa sex offender laws are such that there is zero flexibility or room for common sense.

My son’s court date is coming up. Given the extreme impact that the plea would have on his life, we have decided to try and fight the case in court.

Until my son’s ordeal, I too was naive to the injustices being caused by these ridiculous and wide ranging laws. They do not necessarily target the truly repulsive and dangerous criminals, and will result in many good people’s lives being ruined.

I have two younger children, one girl and one boy. Hence, protecting children from dangerous people is a concern that I share with all parents. However, these laws are being used for entirely different reasons, with devastating consequences.